Maintenance Day 297: Love

“Love is patient, love is kind…It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always endures.”

This weeks gospel reading was one of my favorites. It was one of the readings at our wedding. I’m sure at that time, it meant something completely different than it does now. As we approach the end of our 17th year together (holy wow!), I am truly more in love with my husband than I ever have been.

Love is patient. Although he may disagree with this, I have always admired Brock’s patience with me. We used to lie in bed at night and I would plan out every year of our lives. Our goals (probably more my goals), our dreams (if we were together, they were ours right?), point by point lists of how they would transpire. If he proposed tomorrow, we could get married in a year and half and then get a job, buy a house, and then have kids…and he patiently listened and went along with the plan. Now, patience is a two way street. I am patient with his idiosyncrasies. He is patient with my neuroses. We try to have patience with our children. But through it all, we know that in order to survive and thrive, patience is a necessity. It allows us to stop and listen. To really hear what the other is saying. When it’s been so difficult to find the words to say, we have the patience to wait until we can express our pain, our fears, and our hopes.

It always protects. I’m not a damsel in distress. I don’t want to be protected. I think I can pretty much take care of myself. But I know that none of that matters. Whether I need it or whether I want it are two different things. Brock can sense when I need a hug. He knows when I need a break. I don’t have to ask. He protects me from myself. He carries much of my stress with him. I hope that I do the same for him.

Always hopes. After all these years, we still have hopes and dreams. We may have taken the long road and a few detours along the way but we still want the same things. We still want the perfect life that we always imagined. We often talk about the hopes that we had on our wedding day. Most of them have come true. We have a beautiful home. We have good jobs. We have a wonderful family. And we have each other. None of my dreams would have come true without him.

Always endures. I can only hope that this part is true. We have been through more than most other couples in the past seventeen years. We spent six months of our first three years together in the same town. We struggled through infertility. We survived twins. We are navigating childhood cancer. If we can manage to love each other more after all of that, our love can only grow through the rest of our lives. I look forward to “easy” days, straight roads and boring nights. I look forward to loving this man forever.